Spider in the Loo

One day, after spring cleaning my house, I was hot, sweaty and smelly. In desperate need of a hot shower.


As the warm water massage over my tied shoulders, I let out a rejuvenating sigh. It was a heavenly feeling to let the warm water washing over me. I turned to let the water run down other parts of my body and noticed I was standing in water. The bath had begun to fill and was over my ankles. I thought, I must have left the plug in and scooped down to pull it out and drain the water. But what I felt, was no bath plug, it was hard and scratchy.


I tried to get a good grip, but it get slipping through my fingers. I dug at it with my nail and finally had enough to get a good grip. I tugged and tugged, till finally I pulled it out and there dangling before my eyes, was a black disgusting clump of hair. Horrified I threw it into the toilet bowl, thinking I'd flush it later. I went back to my water massage and forgot about the rudely interrupted moment.


About an hour later, feeling refreshed and carefree, I need to use the toilet. Waltzing into the bathroom, I promptly sat on the toilet, I needed to finish off with the paper work. I then noticed with my peripheral vision something stuck to the side of the toilet bowl. Thinking the worst, I lept out and over the toilet. I couldn't for the life of me think how that dirty great big spider got into the toilet.


I was freaked and with shorts hanging around my ankles and toilet paper still in hand, I headed for the fly spray. After all no matter how scared I was of spiders I couldn't flush it alive. I shuffled back to the toilet and from a good arms length away pointed the fly spray towards the toilet bowl and sprayed. I then used the broom handle to close the seat lid.


I decided to let the spider breath the spray in for a few minutes and to also allow myself some composure, as I pulled my pants up.


Several minutes ticked by and my curiosity got the better of me, I went for a sneak peek.


I sat up on the vanity cabinet and again using the broom handle, I lifted the lid, I could just see the hairy spider still clinging to the side of the bowl. Fuck, I thought. Well I'll just flush now anyway, good bye nasty spider. As I lent forward to flush, I kept one eye on the spider and then I busted into laughter. It was then I recognised the clump of hair I had pulled out of the bathroom drain earlier. So, my hairy spider was no more so that my hairy hair. Gees I was relieved, and thankful to my embarrassment no one was around to witness my episode.