The heavy thick fog of mist valley started to lift and squirts of brilliant sunshine peered through to reveal the small quaint village of Everlong. Hidden by the tall ancient elk trees, a clan not seen to the human eye roomed free among the forest litter.
Rows of blue cottages housed the females while the males lived in rows of pink cottages on the outer skirts. Their service to protect the inner village and more over guard their queen.
Queen Shajul ruled her kingdom kindly. She spent her days nonchalant and frolicking in the garden grounds of her majestic mansion. Her every need catered for and surrounded by plentiful women of natural beauty.
The males slaved their days frantically, working on ways to enrapture and capture the essence of the Queen. In doing so become her betrothed to sire the next royal offspring.
A menacing task daunted most of the males who among themselves found contentment and pleasure. On the phase of the golden night circle, the males, who were brave enough entered the realm. Demonstrating their genius to impress the Queen.
The keeper of the roosters sent his son bravely to address the Queen. Full of confidence and buck, he walked steadily through the beauty that laid revealingly across the floor. Coming into the presence of the Queen made a lump form in his throat and his hands shaking held out a statue of a black cock. Bowing his head in grace he said, “Your majesty I present this black cock to you, so that your kindly eye can look upon it in your garden grounds.”
The Queen summoned a beauty off the floor and whispered into her ear. The beauty stood before the young male and said, “The Queen has no use for a black cock, be removed from the royal chamber.”
Two hefty women stormed into the palace room and grabbed the young male. He dropped the black cock on the floor and it shattered into a thousand tiny pieces. The Queen erupted into laughter and the beauties swooned around her, grooming and pampering. The Queen looked at her beautiful temptresses and smiled as she develled into raw passion.
Your words are becoming much more poetic and I like the style. I like the little pun at the end too :)
ReplyDeleteYou need to use some punctuation, commas in particular, to help the reader read the melody of the piece.
Also, my opinion, the title is out of sync with the majesty of the piece. The title is too guttural and common for the Queen and her beauties so I think play with it to make it something more regal.
Thanks Megan, I changed the title, what do you think?
ReplyDeleteFunny about the commas, I thought I have been putting to many in my writing and had deleted a few.
Ah the bane of my existence - commas :-) I liked this piece Julie - especially the discussions on the role of the sexes.
ReplyDeleteTitle is much better and I love the pun: a black cock picture with a Queen title.
ReplyDeleteHi MG,
ReplyDeleteGrrr commas. Thanks, I liked the role play. Makes for interesting conversation and keeps the mind boggling.
Megan,
Yes I had weetbix for breaky. I thought you might pick up on pun. ;)